Please Don't Refer To Me as a Fruit or a Geometric Shape. My Thoughts on Why I Don't Believe in "Dressing for Your Body Type."

You’re probably getting to know me a lot better through these blog posts. I don’t dress “age appropriately.” I don’t mind packing a little extra when traveling. I definitely don’t believe all horizontal stripes make you look wide. Most importantly, I don’t like putting my body in the category of a fruit or a geometric shape!

Let’s be real. How is associating yourself with an apple really supposed to make you feel? I thought we weren’t supposed to be so hard on ourselves? I don’t want to be compared to an apple or a pear, or a circle or a square for that matter.

Come on ladies!!!! Whose bright idea was this anyway!? Do I sound annoyed? I am.

Think about it…we are asked to equate ourselves with a geometric shape or a fruit. Then we are told how to dress that shape in order to disguise it and make it look more like what society deems as desirable.

Why are we trying to make ourselves look like what society is saying is the ideal way to look? Aren’t we good enough the way we are?

Instead of focusing on what will make us look different (or better) according to “someone”, shouldn’t we focus on what we feel comfortable in and what we like? (Have you read “I. Feel. Pretty.”? Please check it out! It ties into this whole topic!) Just recently I wore this skirt and it doesn’t “minimize” my hips. Being the “hour glass or butternut squash” that I am, I’m guessing I would be told this is a “NO.” However, I LOVE the skirt and I do in fact HAVE HIPS!

Why are we focused on changing the way we want our bodies to look instead of enhancing our style and expressing our personality?

Shouldn’t we spend time finding things we like to wear as opposed to what society is telling us to wear? For example, you’re told you’re a “pear” and pears shouldn’t wear low waisted jeans because they accentuate wider hips. However, you are not comfortable in high waists. As a pear, you are now searching for a high waisted jeans you don’t like to wear. Does this make sense to you? It certainly doesn’t to me!

Do you really think there are only 4 different body types?

This really isn’t a one size fits all program either. There are so many different body types! Everyone can’t possibly fit into 1 of 4 types! For example, I probably fit in the hourglass category, maybe even a butternut squash? However, in this peri-menopause stage of life, I think I’m crossing over into an apple too!!! So, now what?! I’m mixing fruits and veggies!

Do you see why I don’t agree with this style of dressing? It’s so confusing. It puts focus on what’s not important. It puts many women into a small number of categories. It coninues to make us look at our body and what’s “wrong” with it. Most importantly, it takes all the fun out of dressing!

So, what do I recommend?

First look at store catalogues, magazines and Pinterest to help you find looks you like. Look for styles you’d like to try and women whose style you are “crushing on.”

I would encourage you to set aside the “rules of thumb" here. They are not useful and take all the fun out of creating your look.

For example, if you love the look of long skirts and have been told you can’t wear them. I would still stress that you save these photos or pins! Look for versions of these items that you can try on and coordinate with different items to achieve the looks you love.

Here’s why…

You’re 5’2” and you have been told over and over that you “shouldn’t” wear long skirts or dresses. However, you love the look of a maxi. I would encourage you to try some different versions of long skirts/dresses and not to give up on them because someone told you “you can’t or shouldn’t wear it.” There are always options!

Look at these…

Both of these options are cut for petites. They are midi length so they will not be down to your ankle. They are not overwhelming in fabric or pattern and could very well offer a more petite frame an outfit with some length!

This is just one example of missing out on a style because of someone’s “rule” about height!

Check out this Midi Skirt …It’s a little longer for a petite woman but the slits on the side can add length because it draws your eye up and down.

A handkerchief hem can give the illusion of a maxi without adding too much length.

If we stick to these “body type rules” we could be missing out on some fun styles. Take the time to try on and be open to experimenting with new looks. Don’t limit yourself. I promise you, it will be worth it.

If you still need help…please check out Ways to Work with Theo. While you are there take a peek at My Styling Successes. I’d love for you to be this happy too!

Fashionably yours,

---

You Might Also Like These Blog Posts

The Importance Of A Swimsuit Cover Up And My Top Cover Up Picks!

Norma Kamali from Deborah James Fashion, North Palm Beach

This kimono does everything. It serves as a swimsuit cover up, a bathrobe and a duster. The possibilities are endless.

Getting a swimsuit cover up is probably just as important as getting a new swimsuit. I once had a friend tell me “It’s all about the cover up!” She was definitely on to something!

You can’t wear swimsuits through hotel lobbies and you probably aren’t wearing one driving your car to the beach. Even if you are you are, you may want to stop at the grocery store on the way home and you aren’t wearing your swimsuit into Publix!

There is such a variety of cover ups today. How do you choose which one to purchase? Do you prioritize Versatility, Style, or Ease of Wearability? For me, it all depends where I’m going. Am I on vacation? Do I need to think about how much I’m packing? Am I taking a jaunt with the kids to the beach for the day? Will we have armfuls of gear to take with us? Am I on a romantic getaway with my sweetie? Will we be spending most of our time on the beach?

For Versatility…

One of the things I like to keep in mind while shopping for cover ups is to make sure they are versatile. It’s great to be able to take one away on vacation and have it double up as an outfit. Wouldn’t you be happy knowing that your cover up could take you from the beach to dinner with the change of your swimsuit.

A couple of my picks for this look…

Tory Burch Patchwork Dress

This Tory Burch Patchwork Dress-is so pretty and you can leave on the slides, take off the swimsuit and head to a nice dinner.

Blue Boheme from Vagabond Apparel, North Palm Beach

This piece by Blue Boheme from Vagabond Apparel, North Palm Beach is so versatile because it comes with its’ own slip. Throw it on with flip flops and your swimsuit and you can walk through any hotel lobby. Add the slip and a pair of platforms and you’re off to dinner!

You may even have a casual dress in your closet that could double up as a cover up. Be sure to take a look. I am all about shopping your closet!

For style…

You may be heading away on a romantic getaway with your sweetie. Sandcastle building won’t be on the agenda, so you may just choose to go for style. If this is the case you may also want to coordinate your swimsuit with your coverup. White on white is always pretty and colorful patterned tunics over bright swimsuits say “Yay, I’m on vacay!”

Some of my favorite picks for style are…

I always love Johnny Was pieces for vacation. They are light and airy and have a great boho vibe that screams relax! This Clarisse Long Kaftan is a combo of silk and cotton and has such a dramatic look. I think it looks romantic. Do you?

Trina Turk Sarong…love all the colors!

A sarong or pareo is a great choice for a stylish look. Everything But Water has the best selection of sarongs that I have seen. I love this Trina Turk Mosaic Pareo because it has every color under the sun. Sarongs can be worn so many different ways and are perfect for beach walks! It can also be folded over and worn as a short pareo.

I love the cut on this number but it’s the coloration that sold me! You don’t have to worry about someone not finding you on the beach to bring you that cocktail!

For Ease of Wearability…

Or, you may just go for ease of wearability because you’ll be lugging beach toys, sand chairs, towels/blankets and coolers!

Some of my easy cover up choices are…

If you’re headed to the beach with lots of gear you’ll want something easy and cool. I love tunics for this purpose! This Tory Burch Cotton Voile Boatneck Cover Up is simple, easy to move in and requires little effort.

Another tunic style cover up from Vagabond Apparel, North Palm Beach is this lightweight, sheer tee fabric from Pitusa.

Isn’t the back detail cute!?

There are so many variations to this style, sleeveless, short or long too! Check out the back detail!

I love the simplicity of this Le Tarte Luxe Long Beach Shirt. I can also see it over shorts or skinny jeans at another time. For now it’s effortless style for a day at the beach. It also comes in a short version if you would rather not have the length.

Whatever the scenario, there are lots of great options to choose from! First decide the look you’re going for and then make your plan!

Happy relaxing and don’t forget the sunscreen!

---

Check out my other blog post topics:

• Beauty + Makeup
• Closet Cleanse
• Fall/Winter
• Pre-teen Style
• Shopping
• Spring/Summer
• Style Advice
• Style Tips
• Theo's Picks
• Theo's Style Musings
• Travel/Packing

---

You Might Also Like These Blog Posts

"Head Over Sneakers" My Tips On How to Wear Sneakers With A Dress.

I avoided dresses for a long time. Mostly because I felt I had to wear a heel or wedge with them. I enjoy going about my daily routine looking stylish, but comfortable at the same time. I am in and out of the car a lot and heels are not realistic. I instantly fell for the casual look that I could achieve wearing dresses and skirts with sneakers!

I am all about simple and quick when it comes to dressing. While I like to look finished and put together, the Summer months in Florida are too hot to be overdone. I am constantly heading out to the barn for riding lessons or to the beach for surf lessons and those errands make it tough to wear fussy shoes.

So, dresses have become my “go to” solution for those days when I can’t decide what to put on. They are easy to wear for a number of reasons. And, who isn’t about easy? (Especially now that I can throw on some sneaks with them!)

*They can fit any body because they come in a variety of fabrics, shapes and lengths.

*They are cool to wear in the heat of Summer.

*Most importantly, all you have to do is add a shoe and an accessory! You don’t have to match tees or blouses and decide what bottoms to wear! One stop shopping!!!

In order to pull off this look I have a few tips for you!

NO!

1 Don’t wear socks that show!!!! This is one of my most important suggestions.

YES!

A sock that shows, breaks up the line from dress to shoe and draws your attention right to the sock! Your legs will look longer if they don’t have the interruption of a sock.

As the sneaker says “Lovely”

2 If your sneaker has any sort of graphic print you should keep the dress simple. Wear teeshirt styles or solid colors with sneakers that have a little extra something on them.

And, if your dress is a busier print then keep the sneaker simple!

3 Still not sure if you can pull off a sneaker with something a little dressier? Ask yourself “Could I wear this with a flat sandal?” Chances are if you can wear it with a slide or wedge you can wear it with a sneaker. I am not fond of dressier dresses with sneakers. Certain dresses are meant to be worn as cocktail attire.

Another question I like to ask myself is…”How would I feel at the grocery store in this outfit?”

4 Maxi dresses require sneakers that are less bulky. Stick with something simple especially if the dress is a lot longer. If the dress is longer you don’t want it to drag on the ground so even a simple platform could work.

Superga Platform

5 Your sneaker doesn’t have to be the newest rage, you can pull off this trend with a simple Superga or Keds!

KEEP THIS FOR THE GYM!

6 Finally, I would not pair athletic sneakers with dresses. You may see photos of this “trend” but it will look dated very quickly.

Esse Ut Esse

This white sneaker works as it’s more of a street shoe than a gym shoe.

I hope this helps you style sneakers/kicks with some of your favorites Summer Dresses! I know it has helped me get a lot more use out of them! If you try any of these looks, snap a photo and tag me on Instagram @therealchachaolivia!

---

You Might Also Like These Blog Posts

Teaching My Teens How They Dress Matters

I always had the best time shopping for Alex’s clothes. Then one day I bought her an outfit she didn’t like. I knew that day would eventually come. My little girl was growing up and I was excited to see her style evolve.

We started off on a little shopping trip to celebrate her birthday. We were having a lot of fun and finally landed at the shoe department in Nordstrom’s. We came across a sale rack and she was able to try on all the shoes that interested her. She pulled out a pair of heels and they were small enough to fit. It was fun to watch her walk around in them. And then she asked me to buy them for her…she really wanted them! I was not buying them. She was 5! It made me realize as cute as the whole situation was, there were a lot of things we’d have to talk about when it came to dressing.

I had some worries then and I still do now. She is in middle school and these can be difficult years. We are embarking on this long road and there are so many things to discuss as we navigate this next chapter. I’d like to have fashion and shopping remain part of our fun!

It’s important to say here that I’ve had similar discussions with my son about clothing. For the purpose of keeping things simple, I have chosen to chat about the way Alex and I are navigating it. As a family we have been discussing this topic and it has been very interesting to hear their views and thoughts.

I want both of my children to have their own style and to feel comfortable in the clothing they wear. I do, however, want them to realize that it’s important to think about what you wear and what it says about you.

I want both of my children to have their own style. It’s important to feel comfortable in the clothes you are wearing. I know for myself, when I feel put together I am at my most confident. Have you read my blog post "I Feel Pretty"? It’s all about my feelings towards clothing and my confidence. This may not be true for everyone but I can certainly see a difference in Alex’s confidence and the way she carries herself when she is put together in something she chooses to wear. I also recognized it was important for Anthony to choose his own graduation suit and shoes for his end of year events. He stood a little taller and carried himself differently.

Your peers aren’t the only ones who see you. You will be seen by parents, teachers and potential employers all throughout your life. These people may all look at how you present yourself differently. It most likely will matter to them. They will care how you present yourself.

In the same breath, whether we like it or not…this is also the first impression people have of you. The way we carry ourselves and how we present ourselves is the first thing people see. My children explained that their friends respect what other classmates choose to wear and even if they think a classmate is wearing shorts that are too short, exposing cleavage or even wearing a hood over their head in 90 degree weather, it’s their choice to do so. I heard this from other teens that I spoke with too. I was glad to hear that they didn’t judge other kids for the way they dressed. But what I did stress to them was this…your peers aren’t the only ones who see you. You will be seen by parents, teachers and potential employers all throughout your life. These people may all look at how you present yourself differently. It most likely will matter to them. They will care how you present yourself. I was happy to see that they agreed with this.

Where do we go from here?

I decided to give Anthony and Alex a small list of questions to help them navigate choosing an outfit for outside of school events and occasions. I explained to them that these are things I think about myself when getting dressed! They were receptive to the idea because it gives them freedom in choosing their own clothes. I liked it because it takes me out of the equation, and now that we have laid some ground work it builds trust.

*Is this outfit appropriate for the weather?

*Will there be activities that I can comfortably participate in with this outfit?

*Is the outfit I’m planning on wearing appropriate for where I’m going? Is it a funeral, church, an adventure park or the beach?

I know that we still have Middle School and High School years to navigate and the road of “what is appropriate to wear” may not always be this smooth. At least it’s a start. As always, I think openly discussing things is important and so is respecting my children’s opinion. I also realize that every teen is different and so are all parent/child relationships.

I hope you’ll join me next week. Alex and I collaborated on planning her Summer Looks. It was quite an adventure as she has grown out of the children’s department and is shopping in Juniors. There were many more options and it was interesting to see the items she chose and how she arrived at her decisions!

---

You Might Also Like These Blog Posts

10 Ways To Keep Cool And Still Look Stylish In The Humid Summer Months-According To Chacha-Olivia

Auguste - Mila Muse Maxi Dress from Vagabond Apparel Boutique in North Palm Beach

It has taken a long time for me to adjust to the Florida Summers. I remember saying to Anthony, “Will I ever wear a sweater again?!” Not that it didn’t get hot in Connecticut or Massachusetts, it’s just that the Summers in Florida linger from June until October, if you’re lucky.

The move to Florida came at a crazy time in my life. I was beginning to have my “own personal Summers!” Greaaaat! Humidity, Temperatures upwards of 90 degrees and the change of life!

Everyone has a different opinion of what he/she tends to feel cooler wearing. Some of us run hot and some of us run cold. However, I wanted to give you some cute Summer outfit tips that are cool and yet stylish for me.

1) It’s always cooler in the shade so why not try a hat? I like to find the ones that are light weight and have fairly wide brims.

I love this one classic Fedora from Eugenia Kim…Eugenia Kim-Packable-Lillian. The Eugenia Kim product is a little pricier but with an email sign-up you can receive a percentage off your first purchase.

TheEugenia Kim website has a whole section on packable hats and they even suggest hats based on your face shape! Way to go Eugenia!

I also love Helen Kaminski. Here’s a cute new style that comes in a couple color combo’s. I personally like the natural/white combo. Check it out here…Helen Kaminski Kamali 12

If you don’t think you’ll need a hat that often, but you’d like to give it a try, the one I’m wearing above is from JCrew. I’ve had it a long time and probably didn’t spend more than $39 on it.

2) I am much cooler in natural fabrics like cotton and linen. I personally find they breathe better. I often hear “I don’t like linen, I don’t like how wrinkled it looks.” I personally love washable linens. CP Shades and Artists and Revolutionaries design great pieces that are so light and breezy! They also are not meant to look stiff and crisp. Start by trying just a top. I bet you might change your mind!

Check it out here…Regina Top CP Shades

This is one of my personal favs. It has been on the CP Shades line for years. It also doubles as a swimsuit coverup!

This top also comes in solid colors. It washes and wears beautifully. I have literally had mine for years!

Check them out here…Alice and Olivia Fayen Platform

3) While we are talking about natural fabrics I’d like to say the same is true when it comes to shoes. Anything with a synthetic lining will fire up your feet. Sandals with leather or jute insoles are the coolest. Love this little platform from Alice and Olivia. The lining is leather and the foot bed is jute. Winner!

Bombas-No Show Socks with Heel Grip.

4) I always wear “peds” with my sneakers. I find, even with leather sneakers, a sock will help with keeping my feet cool. I’m fond of the ones by Bombas. Please! Purchase the “no show” ones! You don’t want your socks sticking out of those cute sneakers. Bombas donates a pair for every pair sold and they are made of ultra fine gauge cotton. See them here…Bombas No Show Socks

James Perse Crew Neck Slub Tee

James Perse V Neck Slub Tee

5) Wear color! Stay away from black as much as possible. If you need to go darker, try navy. Black absorbs all the light and heat! Colored tees, and fun prints are great for the Summer months. I wear a lot of Black and it makes such a difference when I put on whites, creams or colors. Especially light ones. You have probably heard me talk about this tee before.

The James Perse Crew Neck Slub Tee is lightweight and isn’t clingy but gives a nice shape and comes in a ton of colors. If you’re not a crew neck fan, it also comes in v-neck! James Perse V-Neck Slub Tee.

Mitchell Boyfriend Chino from Blessed Boutique Fashion in Palm Beach Gardens

6) I personally don’t like to wear shorts. I have never really been comfortable showing a lot of leg. However, I mostly don’t like to wear shorts because I don’t find them cool. I dislike sticking to benches or chairs when outside. Getting into a hot car with leather seats can be painful! I love ankle pants or capris in soft fabrics, again mostly natural ones. I like to throw on any basic white tee or graphic one and I’m out the door. You have heard me talk about these Mitchell Boyfriend Chino. They come in a variety of colors and just went on sale so ACT FAST! If you sign up with email you also get $25 off purchase. (Full Price items) There are many ankle pants/crop pants out there. These are my favs. I completely understand why the company’s tag line is “Makers of the World’s Best Fitting Pant”

Mumu -Two Piece Set from Vagabond Apparel Boutique in North Palm Beach

7) I love soft flowy fabrics that come away from the body. I find skirts or dresses that are light in fabric and flow away from the body to be much cooler. The one in the top picture is a dream! It’s from one of my all time favorite stores, Vagabond Apparel in North Palm Beach. Here’s another two piece outfit from Vagabond. Not only is it cool but it’s versatile!

Volt Designs-From Definitely Wendy - Instagram MA

8) Shift dresses are also cooler…I like how they just skim the body, give a nice shape and don’t stick! This one, by Volt designs, is so cool and comfortable. It’s extra comfy because it works well with kicks!

9) Keep your hair off your neck and face! Long hair-wear it in a sweeping pony or messy bun…short hair-pinned back with all the fun hair accessories out now! Give it a whirl! It makes a huge difference!

10) And finally, lighten up on the jewelry! I have staples that I stick to all year but once the heat kicks up I use statement earrings and light weight necklaces and bracelets to complete my looks.

I hope you find my tips for staying cool helpful! Head on over to Instagram when you try them, and let me know how you feel. Tag @therealchachaolivia. I’d love to hear from you!

---

You Might Also Like These Blog Posts